Author Topic: Writer's Cafe Fight Club (not for serious fights)  (Read 3043 times)  

Offline Eric Thomson

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Re: Writer's Cafe Fight Club (not for serious fights)
« Reply #25 on: April 20, 2017, 10:24:48 AM »
Are editors really necessary?
Of course not.  All they do is turn an exciting story into something as dull as dishwater, not to mention their tendency to stifle grammatical creativity.


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Offline Benjamin Douglas

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Re: Writer's Cafe Fight Club (not for serious fights)
« Reply #26 on: April 20, 2017, 10:26:50 AM »
Are editors really necessary?

*Hold my beer*

Is your writing career really necessary?

 ;D

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Offline Becca Mills

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Re: Writer's Cafe Fight Club (not for serious fights)
« Reply #27 on: April 20, 2017, 10:30:57 AM »
Are slow writers just disorganized procrastinators? :P



P.S. Keep it funny, folks!





Offline Rae B. Lake

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Re: Writer's Cafe Fight Club (not for serious fights)
« Reply #28 on: April 20, 2017, 10:35:14 AM »
All vampires suck. It's in the job description.

LMFAO, this made me  laugh out loud literally.
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Offline Beth_Hammond

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Re: Writer's Cafe Fight Club (not for serious fights)
« Reply #29 on: April 20, 2017, 10:39:04 AM »
All fantasy and scifi are nonsense, and not worthy of literary standing.

I'm still figuring this out.
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Offline Dan C. Rinnert

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Re: Writer's Cafe Fight Club (not for serious fights)
« Reply #30 on: April 20, 2017, 10:44:31 AM »
You can have your character rape, murder, torture, maim and do all sorts of unspeakable things to other people, but the moment your character so much as lays a finger on a dog or cat, you're the monster.
       
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Offline TwistedTales

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Re: Writer's Cafe Fight Club (not for serious fights)
« Reply #31 on: April 20, 2017, 10:50:22 AM »
All fantasy and scifi are nonsense, and not worthy of literary standing.

Unless it's hard science, in which case feel free to write whatever you like. Everyone skips over those bits anyway.

Offline Benjamin Douglas

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Re: Writer's Cafe Fight Club (not for serious fights)
« Reply #32 on: April 20, 2017, 10:50:28 AM »
Are slow writers just disorganized procrastinators? :P



P.S. Keep it funny, folks!



Thanks Becca! We do love our mods ;) and I will totes understand if this needs to get shut down if it gets out of hand. But for now I'm enjoying the roasts  8)

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Online Evenstar

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Re: Writer's Cafe Fight Club (not for serious fights)
« Reply #33 on: April 20, 2017, 10:53:07 AM »
Are editors really necessary?

(Good one, I'll get popping)

No, of course not! Apparently you can read a book on self editing and then you're good to hit publish

Offline Benjamin Douglas

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Re: Writer's Cafe Fight Club (not for serious fights)
« Reply #34 on: April 20, 2017, 10:54:13 AM »
All fantasy and scifi are nonsense, and not worthy of literary standing.

Good thing literary fiction is a womanly art and unworthy of a man's time!

*gender role gauntlet has been dropped*

"Your bitter recollections have time to change themselves into sweet remembrances." -Dumas
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Offline Dan C. Rinnert

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Re: Writer's Cafe Fight Club (not for serious fights)
« Reply #35 on: April 20, 2017, 11:21:52 AM »
Let's really kick this thread into high gear . . .

METRIC STINKS!  METRIC STINKS!
       
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Offline KelliWolfe

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Re: Writer's Cafe Fight Club (not for serious fights)
« Reply #36 on: April 20, 2017, 11:29:48 AM »
Let's really kick this thread into high gear . . .

METRIC STINKS!  METRIC STINKS!
Screw the whole decimal system! We should go back to sexagecimal like our great, great, great, great, ..., great, great, great grandparents. If it was good enough for them, it's good enough for us.

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Offline Benjamin Douglas

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Re: Writer's Cafe Fight Club (not for serious fights)
« Reply #37 on: April 20, 2017, 11:34:42 AM »
Clothing is for losers!

"Your bitter recollections have time to change themselves into sweet remembrances." -Dumas
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Offline Eric Thomson

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Re: Writer's Cafe Fight Club (not for serious fights)
« Reply #38 on: April 20, 2017, 11:36:26 AM »
Screw the whole decimal system! We should go back to sexagecimal like our great, great, great, great, ..., great, great, great grandparents. If it was good enough for them, it's good enough for us.
Selling books by the cubit - excellent!  It would make some overly prolific genres easier to move, such as those with the same six-pack abs covers repeated over and over and over  :-*


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Offline harken

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Re: Writer's Cafe Fight Club (not for serious fights)
« Reply #39 on: April 20, 2017, 12:04:53 PM »
Spoilsport! I'm gonna have to kill you in my next book. Choose your manner of death... :D

I want to go out in an earth-shattering KABOOM!

Before I go, though, let's not divert attention from the real problem--Dewey Decimals. Yeah, I said it. That guy Dewey has been shafting us for ages.
« Last Edit: April 20, 2017, 12:11:43 PM by harken »

Offline Gertie Kindle 'a/k/a Margaret Lake'

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Re: Writer's Cafe Fight Club (not for serious fights)
« Reply #40 on: April 20, 2017, 12:10:50 PM »
Are plotters really plodders? And what about those pantsers? Are they the guys on romance covers who only wear pants because they don't own shirts?



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Offline harken

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Re: Writer's Cafe Fight Club (not for serious fights)
« Reply #41 on: April 20, 2017, 12:16:36 PM »
Are plotters really plodders? And what about those pantsers? Are they the guys on romance covers who only wear pants because they don't own shirts?

They're self-published authors. They lost their shirts after publishing their debut novels.

Yes, I am killing way too much time on this thread. Benjamin Douglas bears full responsibility.

Offline IreneP

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Re: Writer's Cafe Fight Club (not for serious fights)
« Reply #42 on: April 20, 2017, 12:28:06 PM »
Hah! This is bound to go horribly wrong as genuine feelings get hurt, but I'll muckle briefly, and stick to the spirit of light-heartedness.

Is Romance the easiest genre to write?

All romance is basically porn. You don't have to have any skill as a writer to be successful. Just photoshop some tats onto Fabio and stick him on the cover.

Offline TwistedTales

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Re: Writer's Cafe Fight Club (not for serious fights)
« Reply #43 on: April 20, 2017, 12:36:59 PM »
I want to go out in an earth-shattering KABOOM!

Before I go, though, let's not divert attention from the real problem--Dewey Decimals. Yeah, I said it. That guy Dewey has been shafting us for ages.

Good choice. You'll be needing our ray-sonic, particle splitting, cluster plasma mine delivered by our mechanized pizza delivery service - it always arrives hot or your money back.

And, yeah, Dewey is a twerp.

Offline KelliWolfe

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Re: Writer's Cafe Fight Club (not for serious fights)
« Reply #44 on: April 20, 2017, 12:40:09 PM »
Are people who won't respond to their reviews just being pansies? Why shouldn't you put your big girl panties on and tell that anonymous troll who gave you the eight paragraph one star review exactly what you think of her and her reading IQ?

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Offline Benjamin Douglas

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Re: Writer's Cafe Fight Club (not for serious fights)
« Reply #45 on: April 20, 2017, 12:49:42 PM »
They're self-published authors. They lost their shirts after publishing their debut novels.

Yes, I am killing way too much time on this thread. Benjamin Douglas bears full responsibility.

I'll take the hit, Harken. But in the spirit of the roast, be honest. You didn't have anything better to do with your time anyway. ;)

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Online VanessaC

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Re: Writer's Cafe Fight Club (not for serious fights)
« Reply #46 on: April 20, 2017, 12:54:00 PM »
(Good one, I'll get popping)

No, of course not! Apparently you can read a book on self editing and then you're good to hit publish

Wait, what, you have to actually, like, read a book in order to write one? What's that all about?  :o

(loving this thread by the way - vampires totally suck)

Offline Dan C. Rinnert

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Re: Writer's Cafe Fight Club (not for serious fights)
« Reply #47 on: April 20, 2017, 12:57:33 PM »
All romance is basically porn. You don't have to have any skill as a writer to be successful. Just photoshop some tats onto Fabio and stick him on the cover.

But be sure to crop him at the neckline.  No one ever wants to see a guy's face.
       
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Offline Dan C. Rinnert

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Re: Writer's Cafe Fight Club (not for serious fights)
« Reply #48 on: April 20, 2017, 01:02:28 PM »
Why can't we all live in a purple submarine instead?
       
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Online Evenstar

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Re: Writer's Cafe Fight Club (not for serious fights)
« Reply #49 on: April 20, 2017, 01:55:33 PM »
No genuine feelings allowed, Evenstar! I'll see your romance jab and raise you another: romance writers are nothing more than a bunch of Hallmark-card writers who don't know how to trim the fat. *MIC DROP*

*these strongly held opinions are not necessarily held by their author. Evenstar is actually amazing, her covers fill my soul with skittle-flavored caviar, and her monster post on keywords gives me life.

You are so super sweet to say that (I was considering removing my covers from my sig and now I'm going to leave them)

But what would you know about romance covers? You're a man and men can't write romance

(gender gauntlet thrown back to you)