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Author Topic: I would love your feedback on my cover! (New pics based on feedback!)  (Read 1627 times)  

Offline MH Johnson

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Thank you for your feedback so far, everyone!

My artist and I have done our best to incorporate the excellent typography (and sword placement) insights others have given so far, and we hope that you will enjoy the final 2 variations we've come up with for the design! (young adult/epic fantasy)  - As always I'd love your feedback, and here's to a wonderful and profitable 2018 for all of us!


                                 






                                                                 


« Last Edit: December 06, 2017, 05:18:30 PM by MH Johnson »

Offline ShayneRutherford

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Re: I would love your feedback on my cover!
« Reply #1 on: November 24, 2017, 10:41:34 PM »
I really like it. The two suggestions I would offer are: 1) get rid of that yellow outline around your author name, and 2) move your author name up to sit under the title so it doesn't block the dragon's nose and the gold.
     

Online Devyn Jayse

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Re: I would love your feedback on my cover!
« Reply #2 on: November 24, 2017, 11:04:51 PM »
I really like it. The two suggestions I would offer are: 1) get rid of that yellow outline around your author name, and 2) move your author name up to sit under the title so it doesn't block the dragon's nose and the gold.

Seconded. Really pretty cover!
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Offline Alix Adale

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Re: I would love your feedback on my cover!
« Reply #3 on: November 24, 2017, 11:06:44 PM »
It's a solid piece of art. The typography could be improved. But, uh, the position of the sword is somewhat ... painful?

Edit: the art has been modified so there's not a longsword sticking out of the guy's crotch.

« Last Edit: December 01, 2017, 06:50:10 PM by Alix Adale »






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Online Devyn Jayse

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Re: I would love your feedback on my cover!
« Reply #4 on: November 24, 2017, 11:09:53 PM »
It's a solid piece of art. The typography could be improved. But, uh, the position of the sword is somewhat ... painful?

 :P I didn't notice & now I can't look away!
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Offline HSh

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Re: I would love your feedback on my cover!
« Reply #5 on: November 24, 2017, 11:12:23 PM »
What a great illustration!


The title disappears in the thumbnail version.  I'd suggest a darker font against the light sky, perhaps? 


I don't know.  Best of luck with it, you've obviously got a great starting image here!  :)

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Online Van Argan

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Re: I would love your feedback on my cover!
« Reply #6 on: November 25, 2017, 12:26:27 AM »
I really like it. The two suggestions I would offer are: 1) get rid of that yellow outline around your author name, and 2) move your author name up to sit under the title so it doesn't block the dragon's nose and the gold.

I agree with Shayne.  You don't want to obstruct the dragon's face.

Your artwork conveys the light tone well.

Online Word Fan

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Re: I would love your feedback on my cover!
« Reply #7 on: November 25, 2017, 04:07:13 AM »
Four young explorers... disguise themselves as knights for a series of epic adventures! Because why eat people when you can trade with them?

Your explanation of the plot makes no sense to me and has several disjointed and disconnected ideas: Explorers disguise themselves as knights so they don't eat the people that they meet and can trade with them.

Uh...

"Explorers" implies humans, not human-eating creatures.

"Knights" are warriors and soldiers, not merchants or tradesmen.

Offline MH Johnson

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Re: I would love your feedback on my cover!
« Reply #8 on: November 25, 2017, 04:25:42 AM »
Your explanation of the plot makes no sense to me and has several disjointed and disconnected ideas: Explorers disguise themselves as knights so they don't eat the people that they meet and can trade with them.

Uh...

"Explorers" implies humans, not human-eating creatures.

"Knights" are warriors and soldiers, not merchants or tradesmen.

You make good points! So let me explain... I was being cute :) They are dragons that turn to boys and, as far as their family is concerned, enjoy 'playing with dinner' FAR too much for their own good! Then when Sorn falls in love with a princes.. you get the idea!


Offline Laran Mithras

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Re: I would love your feedback on my cover!
« Reply #9 on: November 25, 2017, 04:40:07 AM »
Nice cover. Personally, I would darken the image just a little to make the title and name stand out a bit better. The brightness suggests a children's book. If that's what this is, disregard.
 

Offline Jena H

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Re: I would love your feedback on my cover!
« Reply #10 on: November 25, 2017, 05:28:47 AM »
The image is good.  I would look into the following:

~ either change the title font color, or outline the title with a dark color to contrast it from the light-colored background

~ if possible, move the image up a bit so that the author name doesn't cover the dragon's nose and pot of gold.  If that's not possible, I'd move the author name up to 'sit' on the dragon's back.  I'd also make author name a tad bit smaller and change font, but that's just my personal taste.



BTW, as long as your official description/blurb makes sense, don't worry too much about how you described the book here.
Jena

Offline Jessie G. Talbot

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Re: I would love your feedback on my cover!
« Reply #11 on: November 25, 2017, 08:23:26 AM »
I really like it. The two suggestions I would offer are: 1) get rid of that yellow outline around your author name, and 2) move your author name up to sit under the title so it doesn't block the dragon's nose and the gold.

Agreed. And the sword placement isn't too problematic, I did get the impression it was just leaning next to the kid but if people want to hurr hurr over it then that won't hurt a book with a light tone.

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Offline Melody Simmons

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Re: I would love your feedback on my cover!
« Reply #12 on: November 25, 2017, 10:03:21 AM »
It's a nice cover.  It is a Middlegrade book right?  Because that's what it looks like to me.

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Re: I would love your feedback on my cover!
« Reply #13 on: November 25, 2017, 10:54:04 AM »
Who did the art?

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Offline Puddleduck

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Re: I would love your feedback on my cover!
« Reply #14 on: November 25, 2017, 11:26:23 AM »
I really like it. The two suggestions I would offer are: 1) get rid of that yellow outline around your author name, and 2) move your author name up to sit under the title so it doesn't block the dragon's nose and the gold.

Seconded about author name placement. You've got too much space at the top, and the text at the bottom is covering parts of the image that it shouldn't. Stick the author name under the title and I think that's fixed.

Offline abgwriter

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Re: I would love your feedback on my cover!
« Reply #15 on: November 25, 2017, 11:42:29 AM »
Another vote for Shayne's suggestion. The stroke and the beveling take away from the artistic quality of the illustration. Also, you've got plenty of negative space in the top, so putting the author name up would be a win-win to fill that up. 
 

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Offline Jena H

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Re: I would love your feedback on my cover!
« Reply #16 on: November 25, 2017, 05:30:11 PM »
I still prefer the notion of moving the image up a bit.  A little bit of the sky could easily be sacrificed so that the dragon's head can be more easily visible above the author name (which can be made smaller as well).  I like title and author name to not be right above/below each other.   8)
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Offline baldricko

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Re: I would love your feedback on my cover!
« Reply #17 on: November 25, 2017, 05:51:02 PM »
The detail on the dragon is beautiful.

I want to echo Melody Simmons. Is this Middlegrade? What is the market you are aiming for?

The reason I ask is because there's no edge? Even on the sword which I think should look a little worn or at least more detailed.

While the cover is pretty it shows no conflict and that's the problem I see. Perhaps one solution is to introduce an edge/conflict in the titles through your choice of font and some effects? Just a thought.

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Online Rosie A.

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Re: I would love your feedback on my cover!
« Reply #18 on: November 25, 2017, 06:49:47 PM »
I love it! Ah, that dragon is awesome! (love dragons here)

Yes, agreed about moving the author font down some so the dragon's face is unobstructed. Besides that, I think it looks awesome! Love love looooove it.

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Offline Luke Everhart

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Re: I would love your feedback on my cover!
« Reply #19 on: November 26, 2017, 08:50:41 AM »
I think that's a terrific cover image. 👍 Looks great.
But I agree with moving the author name text and imo the author name text shouldn't be more elaborate, embellished than the title text.
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Offline Steve Margolis

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Re: I would love your feedback on my cover!
« Reply #20 on: November 26, 2017, 11:54:57 AM »
I like the cover a lot.
I agree that the sword should be re-positioned.
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Offline Wisescarab

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Re: I would love your feedback on my cover!
« Reply #21 on: November 26, 2017, 11:59:01 AM »
Lovely cover, can't do much wrong there. But yes, re-position the sword.

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Re: I would love your feedback on my cover!
« Reply #22 on: November 26, 2017, 10:37:43 PM »
Yes, do move the sword.  ;D The pic clearly let's us know at glance that  it YA. The blurby bit is funny, but you might want to split the sentence up into smaller sentences to be more clear for your readership. I agree about moving your name away from the dragon's snout. Good luck with your book!

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Offline Dana L.

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Re: I would love your feedback on my cover!
« Reply #23 on: November 28, 2017, 07:58:58 AM »
It's beautiful. I agree mildly about the sword. I like the idea of moving up your name. I think the cover definitely looks YA and I would try darkening it a bit, so it looks a little less cheery?

Offline Puddleduck

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Re: I would love your feedback on my cover!
« Reply #24 on: November 28, 2017, 08:03:50 AM »
I didn't notice anything weird about the sword until other people started snickering about it. But lots of people's minds go to places mine doesn't. But for Middle Grade? I doubt that's something most middle grade readers would immediately notice/think of. I mean, who's your market here?

I think it's a lovely piece of art, but someone else had a good point that there's not a lot of action going on or even implied here, which might be a problem if you're going for the MG fantasy adventure audience.

Offline MH Johnson

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Re: I would love your feedback on my cover!
« Reply #25 on: November 29, 2017, 01:34:42 AM »
Thank you all for your feedback, I wanted to let everyone know how much I appreciate it, a number of you regulars have helped me with your insights before and I absolutely love the kboard community for taking such an interest in helping us newer authors spread our wings and fly!

A point I should have made awhile ago, perhaps, is that this story is aimed as epic/coming of age fantasy, but it definitely has lighthearted elements,  Terry Pratchett and David Eddings were both inspirational to my original muse. The protagonists are younger dragons just spreading their wings, and it has at least a bit of the more idealistic heroes journey vibe, but my hope is that the story will appeal to lovers of fantasy in general.

Offline MissingAlaska

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Re: I would love your feedback on my cover!
« Reply #26 on: November 29, 2017, 04:26:19 AM »
One way to make the font stand out is to darken the top of the image using a subtle, graduated transparency (another layer between the font and image).  Try a washed-out grey/blue and have it go completely transparent just below the title.  The natural contrast between a steely blue sky and the gold font might be enough to make this pop.

I don't see the sword placement as a problem. I would not change that.


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Offline Marty South

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Re: I would love your feedback on my cover!
« Reply #27 on: November 29, 2017, 07:04:00 AM »
I didn't notice anything weird about the sword until other people started snickering about it. But lots of people's minds go to places mine doesn't. But for Middle Grade? I doubt that's something most middle grade readers would immediately notice/think of.

Have you spent much time with 11 or 12-year-olds lately?! Especially the boys. You give them anything long and pointy or tubular, and it will at some point become a pantomime penis. It's what they do.

Offline DIAMONDSINTHESKY

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Re: I would love your feedback on my cover!
« Reply #28 on: November 30, 2017, 03:25:17 AM »
I really like it. The two suggestions I would offer are: 1) get rid of that yellow outline around your author name, and 2) move your author name up to sit under the title so it doesn't block the dragon's nose and the gold.

Really love the cover, same feedback from me. Looks like an interesting book that would definitely appeal to readers of that genre.

Offline Puddleduck

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Re: I would love your feedback on my cover!
« Reply #29 on: November 30, 2017, 06:26:07 AM »
Have you spent much time with 11 or 12-year-olds lately?! Especially the boys. You give them anything long and pointy or tubular, and it will at some point become a pantomime penis. It's what they do.

No, but even when I was that age, I don't remember seeing boys do that much. I'm not sure we should be catering so strongly to the most immature possible audience (are boys like that even big readers anyway?), or else it turns into that SNL sketch with Nicholas Cage about "Oz-wee-pay" Johnson.

Offline Marty South

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Re: I would love your feedback on my cover!
« Reply #30 on: November 30, 2017, 07:21:09 AM »
No, but even when I was that age, I don't remember seeing boys do that much. I'm not sure we should be catering so strongly to the most immature possible audience (are boys like that even big readers anyway?), or else it turns into that SNL sketch with Nicholas Cage about "Oz-wee-pay" Johnson.

I'm not suggesting this cover was catering to any particular level of maturity. The sword positioning appears more like an unfortunate accident. I'm merely suggesting that, given the intended middle grade audience for this book, the cover might elicit such a reaction. Yes, it would be immature, as the eight to twelve-year-old age group tends to be, pretty much by definition. Boys, by the way, do read.

As far as the overall cover goes, I think it's a great cover. I don't necessarily think the sword is a deal breaker, either--maybe just something to be aware of.

Offline Puddleduck

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Re: I would love your feedback on my cover!
« Reply #31 on: November 30, 2017, 04:37:14 PM »
Boys, by the way, do read.

I certainly didn't mean to question whether boys in general read. I meant to question whether the types of boys who make penises out of everything are big readers. And no, I really don't think all boys make penises out of everything.

Offline MH Johnson

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Re: I would love your feedback on my cover! (New pics based on feedback!)
« Reply #32 on: November 30, 2017, 10:47:14 PM »
Some great feedback on sword and title placement, thank you for that, everyone! I put up 2 new full sized variants up top, here are the thumbnails real quick, I'd love to know what people thought/which looked better!

           

Offline ShayneRutherford

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Re: I would love your feedback on my cover! (New pics based on feedback!)
« Reply #33 on: November 30, 2017, 10:54:55 PM »
Some great feedback on sword and title placement, thank you for that, everyone! I put up 2 new full sized variants up top, here are the thumbnails real quick, I'd love to know what people thought/which looked better!

           

I love this one. But I'd suggest a little more glow around your name, to make the O and the N in Johnson stand out more.
     

Online Devyn Jayse

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Re: I would love your feedback on my cover! (New pics based on feedback!)
« Reply #34 on: December 01, 2017, 12:35:51 AM »
Some great feedback on sword and title placement, thank you for that, everyone! I put up 2 new full sized variants up top, here are the thumbnails real quick, I'd love to know what people thought/which looked better!

           

As a thumbnail I prefer the one on the right. But overall, think the first should be your pick.
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Offline Day Leitao

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Re: I would love your feedback on my cover! (New pics based on feedback!)
« Reply #35 on: December 01, 2017, 06:19:46 AM »
Some great feedback on sword and title placement, thank you for that, everyone! I put up 2 new full sized variants up top, here are the thumbnails real quick, I'd love to know what people thought/which looked better!

           

Awesome work!

I love the first new version, and the dark bottom makes it seem less lighthearted. But I don't like glow around names. On top, around your name, can't you have a little cloud, vapour, something white? Or move the name. Because the font with the glow is not very visible and doesn't look professional over the tree.

In the bottom, Gold and Glory could perhaps be lighter, because it's hard to see as a thumbnail.

I like it that the kid and the dragon are in the middle and more visible.

Don't worry about the sword. If it's a coming of age tale, think of puberty and all... It's perfectly placed.  :D

Offline Kathy Dee

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Re: I would love your feedback on my cover! (New pics based on feedback!)
« Reply #36 on: December 01, 2017, 06:21:19 AM »
Good job: I like 'em both, but I like the 2nd best.

Offline Jessie G. Talbot

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Re: I would love your feedback on my cover! (New pics based on feedback!)
« Reply #37 on: December 01, 2017, 07:03:53 AM »
Def the 2nd one.

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Offline Moticom

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Re: I would love your feedback on my cover! (New pics based on feedback!)
« Reply #38 on: December 01, 2017, 08:41:57 AM »
Some great feedback on sword and title placement, thank you for that, everyone! I put up 2 new full sized variants up top, here are the thumbnails real quick, I'd love to know what people thought/which looked better!

           

The first one is much better, definitely. Typography and layout much more professional.

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Offline MH Johnson

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Re: I would love your feedback on my cover! (New pics based on feedback!)
« Reply #39 on: December 06, 2017, 05:21:32 PM »
Thank you all for the great feedback, you've really helped, thanks KBoards! - My artist and I came up with 2 final variants, I'm posting here at the end as well...

I'd love to know what you liked best!


                                 






                                                                 



Offline Puddleduck

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Re: I would love your feedback on my cover! (New pics based on feedback!)
« Reply #40 on: December 06, 2017, 06:07:12 PM »
I like the top one. The only thing is that it looks like your series title is bigger than your book title? It reads as "Dragonsign, Book One: Gold and Glory". To me, the book title should always be larger than the series title. You want people to know what the title of the book is, and when the series title is bigger, it causes confusion. This is especially true once you've got more than one book in the series out. Having the series title biggest can make it look like the second book is the same book with different cover art. I've just never understood why anyone would make the series title bigger on a book cover, since the individual title is far more important.

Online C. Gold

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Re: I would love your feedback on my cover! (New pics based on feedback!)
« Reply #41 on: December 06, 2017, 06:11:50 PM »
The darker font is easier to read, especially in thumbnail. So cover 1 for me.

Offline Jena H

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Re: I would love your feedback on my cover! (New pics based on feedback!)
« Reply #42 on: December 06, 2017, 07:22:35 PM »
#1 definitely.  The dark font for author name is much better than the gold color.
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Offline Day Leitao

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Re: I would love your feedback on my cover! (New pics based on feedback!)
« Reply #43 on: December 09, 2017, 03:20:16 PM »
The first one is much better. The only thing is that Book One is not super clear. Maybe you could take out the glow from those words only. I don't think it's  a problem if it's different.

Awesome work!

Offline Dana L.

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Re: I would love your feedback on my cover! (New pics based on feedback!)
« Reply #44 on: December 10, 2017, 07:24:19 AM »
Cover #1 is the best! I didn't notice "Book One" immediately; it needs something to make it more obvious. This cover is so great; I love it.

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