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Author Topic: CAPS-LOCK WEDNESDAY: BAD BATMAN POETRY EDITION  (Read 455 times)  

Online Dan C. Rinnert

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CAPS-LOCK WEDNESDAY: BAD BATMAN POETRY EDITION
« on: December 05, 2017, 09:37:20 PM »
HOLY HALF-A-CANNOLLI BATMAN!  IT'S TIME FOR CAPS-LOCK WEDNESDAY AND TODAY'S THEME COMES TO US BY WAY OF A MONTHS-OLD SUGGESTION FROM V.P. WHO ACTUALLY MEANT IT AS TWO SEPARATE SUGGESTIONS BUT WE DON'T FOLLOW NO RULES 'ROUND HERE SO THOSE TWO HAVE BECOME ONE, WHICH MEANS IT IS TIME FOR THE BAD BATMAN POETRY EDITION!  YOUR CHOICE WHETHER IT'S BAD POETRY ABOUT BATMAN OR POETRY ABOUT BAD BATMAN BUT ALSO AIN'T NO REASON IT CANNOT BE BOTH!  ALL UP TO YOU!

BUT, FIRST, WE MUST SHARE WHAT WE LEARNED THIS WEEK . . .   YEAH, I THINK WE BEST BETTER JUST DECLARE A "NO COMMENT" ON RECENT STUFF, YOU KNOW?  SO, ON THAT NOTE, LET'S GET ON WITH IT, EH?

THERE ONCE WAS A YOUNG BOY NAMED BRUCE,
WHEN THE NUTS FROM ARKHAM GOT LOOSE.
WHILE THEY WERE A CRIMINALING,
BRUCE CALLED ALFRED WITH A BELL RING,
AND TOLD HIM, "I WANNA PET MOOSE."


APPLAUSE-O-METER:

Offline D A Bale

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Re: CAPS-LOCK WEDNESDAY: BAD BATMAN POETRY EDITION
« Reply #1 on: December 05, 2017, 10:03:07 PM »
THE BAD GUYS WERE FUNNIN'
SO BATMAN CAME RUNNIN'
WHEN THE BATSIGNAL FIRED UP, WHAT A SIGHT!

NOW THE BADDIES ARE SLUMMIN'
AND GORDON IS SUNNIN'
'CAUSE BATMAN'S IN CHARGE OF THE NIGHT.

Offline Jeff Tanyard

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Re: CAPS-LOCK WEDNESDAY: BAD BATMAN POETRY EDITION
« Reply #2 on: December 05, 2017, 10:53:28 PM »
YOUNG BRUCE WAYNE WAS A DOUR YOUNG THING
A DOUR YOUNG THING WAS HE
HE PUT ON HIS MASK
HE PUT ON HIS CAPE
HE CARRIED HIS BATARANGS THREE

HE CALLED FOR NO FIDDLER, 'CAUSE HE FACED THE RIDDLER
AS VILE A CROOK AS THERE BE
WHO ESCAPED THE ASYLUM
'CAUSE HE KNEW HOW TO RILE 'EM
AND THEN TAUNTED BATMAN WITH GLEE

THE DARK KNIGHT PURSUED, THE RIDDLER CAME UNGLUED
FROM GOTHAM WAS FORCED TO FLEE
HE WENT BACK TO ARKHAM
BEFORE BATMAN COULD NARC HIM
AND DECIDED "INSANITY" TO PLEA
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Online shimmering

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Re: CAPS-LOCK WEDNESDAY: BAD BATMAN POETRY EDITION
« Reply #3 on: December 06, 2017, 03:35:18 AM »
WHEN I'M A BAD BATMAN I'LL TELL TARADIDDLES
BUT DEAR TARADIDDLES WON'T LISTEN TO ME
SHE'LL CLAW AT THE WALLS AND SHE'LL STALK ROUND THE BATCAVE
SHE'LL PURR ON THE CARPET IN FRONT OF THE BATFIRE
SHE'LL CLIMB ON THE BATDESK AND BRING ME A BATMOUSE
BUT BEING BAD BATMAN SHE'LL LEAVE UP TO ME

Offline Mercia McMahon

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Re: CAPS-LOCK WEDNESDAY: BAD BATMAN POETRY EDITION
« Reply #4 on: December 06, 2017, 06:59:41 AM »
BATMAN IS EPIC, MAN. ILLIAD DOES NOT COMPARE TO HIS SUPERNESS.

BAD BATMAN DACTYLIC HEXAMETER (APOLOGIES TO HOMER SIMPSON)


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Re: CAPS-LOCK WEDNESDAY: BAD BATMAN POETRY EDITION
« Reply #5 on: December 06, 2017, 07:45:42 AM »
BAD BATMAN SHOT THE JOKER WITH A BATARANG
AND JOKER SWORE THE LAST LAUGH FOR A PENALTY

ALL AROUND IN GOTHAM TOWN
THEY'RE TRYING TO TRACK BAD BATMAN DOWN
THEY SAY THEY WANT TO BRING HIM SALTY
AND JOKER SWORE THE LAST LAUGH FOR A PENALTY

EVERY TIME BATMAN TRIES TO BE BRUCE WAYNE
THEY SAY UNMASK HIM BEFORE HE GOES
YEAH UNMASK HIM BEFORE HE GOES

BUT HE SAY!

BAD BATMAN SHOT THE JOKER WITH A BATARANG
AND JOKER SWORE THE LAST LAUGH FOR A PENALTY

FREEDOM CAME BAD BATMANS WAY ONE DAY
AS HE SAW THE JOKER FINALLY FROWN
BAD BATMAN DECIDED TO SHOOT HIM DOWN
SO HE SHOT, HE SHOT THE JOKER DOWN (LORD OH YA YA)

REFLEXES GOT THE BETTER OF BAD BATMAN
AND WHAT WOULD BE WOULD BE
BATMAN THREW THE JOKER IN THE CHEMICAL WELL
BUT THE JOKER THEM CLIMBED BACK OUT
YES THE JOKER HE CLIMBED HIS WAY BACK OUT

BAD BATMAN SHOT THE JOKER WITH A BATARANG
AND JOKER SWORE THE LAST LAUGH FOR A PENALTY
PREVAIL - Owen Hunter Series Book 3: 99%
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Offline kdiem

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Re: CAPS-LOCK WEDNESDAY: BAD BATMAN POETRY EDITION
« Reply #6 on: December 06, 2017, 07:58:53 AM »
TODAY'S SNACK IS CANNOLI AND COFFEE OR TEA.

OH, YOU WANT A POEM, TOO?

THERE ONCE WAS A RICH BOY NAMED BRUCE,
HIS PARENTS' DEATH DID TRAUMA INDUCE,
SO HE DRESSED LIKE A BAT,
KISSED A CRIMINAL CAT,
AND TRIED TO MAKE BAD GUYS VAMOOSE


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Offline D A Bale

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Re: CAPS-LOCK WEDNESDAY: BAD BATMAN POETRY EDITION
« Reply #7 on: December 06, 2017, 10:12:07 AM »
TODAY'S SNACK IS CANNOLI AND COFFEE OR TEA.

KDIEM SAVES THE DAY!

Online Dan C. Rinnert

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Re: CAPS-LOCK WEDNESDAY: BAD BATMAN POETRY EDITION
« Reply #8 on: December 06, 2017, 10:22:07 AM »
TODAY'S SNACK IS CANNOLI AND COFFEE OR TEA.

SO, NO CANNOLI FOR THE TEA DRINKERS?  THAT'S DISCRIMINATION!  I'M CALLING A MOD.  BETSY!!!

Offline D A Bale

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Re: CAPS-LOCK WEDNESDAY: BAD BATMAN POETRY EDITION
« Reply #9 on: December 06, 2017, 10:25:01 AM »
SO, NO CANNOLI FOR THE TEA DRINKERS?  THAT'S DISCRIMINATION!  I'M CALLING A MOD.  BETSY!!!

I'M PRETTY SURE BETSY'S BUSY - EATING CANNOLI AND DRINKING COFFEE.

BY THE WAY, KDIEM, WHAT EXACTLY IS CANNOLI?  IS IT SOME SORT OF DONUT WITH FILLING?

Offline kdiem

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Re: CAPS-LOCK WEDNESDAY: BAD BATMAN POETRY EDITION
« Reply #10 on: December 06, 2017, 11:22:03 AM »
SO, NO CANNOLI FOR THE TEA DRINKERS?  THAT'S DISCRIMINATION!  I'M CALLING A MOD.  BETSY!!!

ACTUALLY, I'M DISCRIMINATING AGAINST THE HOT CHOCOLATE DRINKERS, SINCE THEY WEREN'T MENTIONED AT ALL.

JUST KIDDING. TEA DRINKERS CAN HAVE CANNOLI TOO.

WAIT, I FORGOT I LIKE HOT CHOCOLATE. CANNOLI FOR EVERYONE, NO MATTER THEIR DRINK OF CHOICE! WOO HOO!

OK, LET'S ANNOUNCE THE SNACK AGAIN:

TODAY'S SNACK IS CANNOLI. YOU CAN HAVE YOUR DRINK OF CHOICE WITH IT.

I'M PRETTY SURE BETSY'S BUSY - EATING CANNOLI AND DRINKING COFFEE.

BY THE WAY, KDIEM, WHAT EXACTLY IS CANNOLI?  IS IT SOME SORT OF DONUT WITH FILLING?

NOT EXACTLY. IT'S... UMM. CANNOLI. MORE LIKE ONE OF THOSE SUPER-THIN COOKIES WRAPPED AROUND A FILLING. CANNOLI IS A DEEP-FRIED CRISPY PASTRY ROLLED INTO A TUBE AND FILLED WITH RICOTTA/MASCARPONE. THE FILLING USUALLY INCLUDES CHOCOLATE CHIPS AND MAY INCLUDE A TOUCH OF WINE. THE ENDS ARE FREQUENTLY DIPPED IN CHOCOLATE AND THE WHOLE THING IS OFTEN DUSTED WITH POWDERED SUGAR. IT'S TERRIBLE FOR YOU AND A PAIN TO MAKE, BUT DELICIOUS.

HERE'S A DECENT RECIPE: HTTPS://WWW.COOKINGCLASSY.COM/CANNOLI/


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Offline V.P.

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Re: CAPS-LOCK WEDNESDAY: BAD BATMAN POETRY EDITION
« Reply #11 on: December 06, 2017, 01:02:00 PM »
THERE ONCE WAS A BAD GUY NAMED JOKER
WHO CHALLENGED BATMAN TO A GAME OF POKER.
THE JOKER WON BIG
SO HE DANCED A WILD JIG
CROWING "BATMAN, TAKE JOKER TO YOUR BROKER!"


Online Jim Johnson

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Re: CAPS-LOCK WEDNESDAY: BAD BATMAN POETRY EDITION
« Reply #12 on: December 06, 2017, 01:07:00 PM »
TWO GUNSHOTS GAVE BIRTH
TO THE BLACK-CAPED CRUSADER.
BRUCE WAYNE IS BATMAN.

OOPS! SPOILER ALERT!
DON'T READ THAT, GOTHAM BAD GUYS.
BATMAN IS BATMAN.


And this seems appropriate:

<a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=17CLlZuiBkQ" target="_blank">http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=17CLlZuiBkQ</a>

Online Gareth K Pengelly

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Re: CAPS-LOCK WEDNESDAY: BAD BATMAN POETRY EDITION
« Reply #13 on: December 06, 2017, 02:14:55 PM »
BATMAN ON THE MOTORWAY,
LORRY COMING OTHER WAY,
FLATMAAAAAAN, FLATMAAAAAN, FLATMAAAAAAN....

Online Dan C. Rinnert

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Re: CAPS-LOCK WEDNESDAY: BAD BATMAN POETRY EDITION
« Reply #14 on: December 06, 2017, 02:50:50 PM »
WITH ALL THE SURPRISINGLY GOOD BAD BATMAN POETRY IN THIS THREAD, SOME OF YOU SHOULD CONSIDER BEING WRITERS OR SOMETHING.

Offline ReGina W

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Re: CAPS-LOCK WEDNESDAY: BAD BATMAN POETRY EDITION
« Reply #15 on: December 06, 2017, 03:52:25 PM »
FOR YOUR PERUSAL...A BAD HAIKU

TROUBLE? CALL THE BAT
WINGED NIGHTTIME DENIZEN
BATMAN CANNOT FLY
      
ReGinaWelling.com

Offline Evenstar

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Re: CAPS-LOCK WEDNESDAY: BAD BATMAN POETRY EDITION
« Reply #16 on: December 06, 2017, 04:29:24 PM »
I DRESS LIKE A BAT AND I WEAR BLACK LEATHER
ROBIN AND I CHASED GIRLS TOGETHER
BUT SINCE HE WENT AND BECAME NIGHTWING
I ROLL SOLO WHEN I DO MY THING
LIKE MR FREEZE ON HIS KNEES
OR PLAYING WITH JOKER WHO IS A TEASE
AND THE SCARECROW, WELL, HE FILLS MY DREAMS
TWO FACE LIKES TO HEAR MY SCREAMS
AND THAT SEXY CAT IS GOING TO PAY
HER WHIP HAND MADE ME CHAFF ALL DAY
BANE IS SUCH A BRAWNY BRUTE
RIDDLER WEARS A SKIN TIGHT SUIT
I COULD GO ON, AS SUB OR DOM
BUT THEY ALL SAY THE SAME THING WHEN I'M GONE
WHO WAS THAT GUY? I'M SUCH A FAN
DON'T THEY KNOW, I'M BATMAN

DC RULES OK

Offline Benjamin Douglas

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Re: CAPS-LOCK WEDNESDAY: BAD BATMAN POETRY EDITION
« Reply #17 on: December 06, 2017, 04:33:51 PM »
BATMAN
ATMANB
TMANBA
MANBAT
ANBATM
NBATMA

Offline lyndabelle

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Re: CAPS-LOCK WEDNESDAY: BAD BATMAN POETRY EDITION
« Reply #18 on: December 06, 2017, 09:59:57 PM »
BATMAN MIGHT BE COOL
BUT CATWOMAN IS COOLER
NOTHING BETTER THAN HER
SERVING UP BATMAN STRUDEL


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Online Dan C. Rinnert

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Re: CAPS-LOCK WEDNESDAY: BAD BATMAN POETRY EDITION
« Reply #19 on: December 06, 2017, 10:17:32 PM »
ALL RIGHTY THEN, EVERYONE.  THERE'S A PALE MOONLIGHT OUTSIDE, WHICH MEANS IT IS TIME TO DANCE WITH THE DEVIL AND ANNOUNCE THIS WEEK'S BIG WINNER!

AND THAT WINNER IS ALL OF YOU!  THAT IS, EACH AND EVERY ONE OF YOU, NOT YOUR WHOLE BODY.  THAT WOULD BE WEIRD.  AND, ALL BUT ONE OF YOU.  YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE.  WHAT WERE YOU THINKING?

SO CONGRATULATIONS TO ALL BUT ONE OF YOU.  NOW, GO OUT THERE AND GET YOUR TOWN AN ENEMA.  IT REALLY NEEDS IT.  PEW!

NOW, I'VE SEEN THE FUTURE, BABE, AND IT LOOKS A LITTLE NOTHING LIKE THIS . . .  HIT IT!

<a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ulOLYnOthIw" target="_blank">http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ulOLYnOthIw</a>

Offline Jeff Tanyard

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Re: CAPS-LOCK WEDNESDAY: BAD BATMAN POETRY EDITION
« Reply #20 on: December 06, 2017, 11:07:01 PM »
DAN, YOU'RE A TRUE PARTYMAN.


<a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yjD9X2mPIXY" target="_blank">http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yjD9X2mPIXY</a>
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Offline Evenstar

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Re: CAPS-LOCK WEDNESDAY: BAD BATMAN POETRY EDITION
« Reply #21 on: December 07, 2017, 01:41:04 AM »

AND THAT WINNER IS ALL OF YOU!  THAT IS, EACH AND EVERY ONE OF YOU, NOT YOUR WHOLE BODY.  THAT WOULD BE WEIRD.  AND, ALL BUT ONE OF YOU.  YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE.  WHAT WERE YOU THINKING?


LOL, I'M GUESSING ME...

Come on, you don't think the suit is just a teeny bit BDSM?