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Author Topic: Share your weird or funny "I'm an author" stories and interactions  (Read 4526 times)  

Offline Boyd

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Re: Share your weird "I'm an author" stories and interactions
« Reply #25 on: June 09, 2018, 05:14:41 AM »
Let me preface this by saying I have no fashion sense. My hair nowadays is long(er) and slightly unkempt.   Same could be said about my beard when the incident happened earlier this spring. Also, I'm a cheapskate, which is why I drive older vehicles with some wear and tear on them...  I was sitting in a parking ramp, waiting for my daughter to finish up her appointment when an Escalade pulled across from me. I noticed it right away because it had a flat and the guy was running it on his rim.  I watch him get his stuff out and asked him if he needed a hand and helped him change out his tire.

We get talking while I was doing that and waiting for my daughter. At some point, the guy asked me what I do and I told him I write science fiction novels. He asked if I do ok with that, and I told him my usual reply of "Keeps me in Cheerios" cuz Boyd is flippant, yo! Anyways, my daughter gets out just as the SUV is getting back on all four tires.  The guy pulls out money and I told him that's ok, I was just being helpful, for him to pass it on. He pressed it in my hand and told me I needed it more than him.  I was a little flabbergasted and he drove off to the tire shop to get the flat fixed or replaced.  I get in the car with my daughter and find five one dollar bills he pressed into my hand.

Cheerios indeed. I find it funny now but didn't know how to take it when it happened.

Online levz

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Re: Share your weird "I'm an author" stories and interactions
« Reply #26 on: June 09, 2018, 06:23:07 AM »
I caught an Uber when I was in Kuala Lumpur and the driver asked what I did for a living. I told him I was a writer so he asked what I wrote because he wanted to read it. Since he was an older man, I told him he probably wouldn't be interested because I wrote romance. Turns out the guy is a huge romance fan! When we stopped at the lights, he took a selfie with me because he'd never met a writer before. Next set of lights, he made my find my books on the Amazon app on his phone and he bought a couple.

With the cheap price of Ubers in Malaysia, I came out ahead on that ride, and learned a valuable lesson about making assumptions about readers :)

I loved reading this.


I've told it before, but...

I told a friend about what NaNoWriMo was. She got wide-eyed and said, "you mean it takes you writers a whole MONTH to write a book?" As if we were dawdling along at a book per month. Still makes me chuckle.

Ha, that's funny. :)

Offline Anarchist

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Re: Share your weird "I'm an author" stories and interactions
« Reply #27 on: June 09, 2018, 06:49:13 AM »
When talking about my businesses, I treat strangers like IRS agents...

Stranger: What do you do?

Me: I create products.

Stranger: What kind of products?

Me: Depends on the business. For my publishing business, I write books.

Stranger: Do you make money writing books?

Me: I do okay.

Like Boyd, I drive an old car (2006 Corolla). I wear shabby clothes (my wife affectionately calls me Hobo Joe). I wear no trappings of wealth - not even a wedding ring. The only sign of "success" is a big house in a nice part of Southern California (everything else gets invested). But strangers don't see the house.

Friends and family are different. They know me. They know I wouldn't be in publishing for three years without a reasonable payoff. I don't share numbers with them, but when I tell them "the book business is good," they know what that means. No other explanation is required.

"Opportunity is missed by most people because it is dressed in overalls and looks like work." - Thomas Edison

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Offline TromboneAl

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Re: Share your weird "I'm an author" stories and interactions
« Reply #28 on: June 09, 2018, 08:34:25 AM »
Lots of LOLs here!

I asked my daughter what she thought about a sex scene in one of my books. She mimed grimacing, closing her eyes, and flipping pages.

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Offline SallyRose

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Re: Share your weird "I'm an author" stories and interactions
« Reply #29 on: June 09, 2018, 09:10:17 AM »
A lot of great stories here!

The one that came to mind for me happened years ago. I worked for a large tech company and was in Sydney on a business trip. I traveled there with a colleague I thought was a really great guy (Bob), and we tacked a few days onto the end of our trip to relax and see the sights.

A colleague from the Sydney office was amazing (Mark). He took us to see the Blue Mountains and for an evening out with he and his wife. I had a wonderful time...until midway through the dinner.

Mark: So if you didn't work in tech and had to pick an entirely different career, what would you do?

Me: *excited to share* I'd be a writer. I've always wanted to be a writer.

Bob: Oh, let me guess...you'd write romance novels. <insert tone dripping with condescension and mockery>  ???

Fortunately, Mark, being classy and a great conversationalist, immediately jumped in with interest and we had a great discussion about favorite authors and books.

Probably not a shocker that I lost all interest in my budding relationship with Bob. Life's too short to waste time with a dream-squasher  :P

Offline Puddleduck

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Re: Share your weird "I'm an author" stories and interactions
« Reply #30 on: June 09, 2018, 10:09:44 AM »
I asked my daughter what she thought about a sex scene in one of my books. She mimed grimacing, closing her eyes, and flipping pages.

To be fair, this is probably how most daughters would react if their dad asked them to read a sex scene he'd written.

I would assume the reverse to also be true, which is why I don't necessarily show my dad everything I've ever written.

Offline VirginiaMcClain

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Re: Share your weird "I'm an author" stories and interactions
« Reply #31 on: June 09, 2018, 10:11:26 AM »
To be fair, this is probably how most daughters would react if their dad asked them to read a sex scene he'd written.

I would assume the reverse to also be true, which is why I don't necessarily show my dad everything I've ever written.

I recently cut a sex scene from my WIP because I thought about my mom reading it and decided it didn't really need to be there. :-/ Ack! I need to consider a pseudonym...
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Offline David VanDyke

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Re: Share your weird "I'm an author" stories and interactions
« Reply #32 on: June 09, 2018, 10:14:17 AM »
He asked if I do ok with that, and I told him my usual reply of "Keeps me in Cheerios"

I'm totally stealing that.


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Offline Puddleduck

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Re: Share your weird "I'm an author" stories and interactions
« Reply #33 on: June 09, 2018, 10:18:32 AM »
I recently cut a sex scene from my WIP because I thought about my mom reading it and decided it didn't really need to be there. :-/ Ack! I need to consider a pseudonym...

This kinda depends more on the individuals, I think. My mom's totally fine with all that stuff (but then, she used to be in the medical field, so she's [sometimes uncomfortably] okay with body stuff). I do have other relatives where, if they were to ask about some of my books, I might go, "Yeah, you probably don't want to read it."

One of my pet peeves is when acquaintances are trying to be supportive of my writing--verbally supportive, not supportive in the way of actually buying or reading my books--say something like, "When you're famous, I'll be able to say, 'I knew her when.'" That just drives me crazy and makes me want to give them a lecture about how success is measured and the likelihood of any new authors these days becoming household names.

Offline Boyd

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Online Jan Hurst-Nicholson

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Re: Share your weird "I'm an author" stories and interactions
« Reply #35 on: June 09, 2018, 12:50:47 PM »
Enough good stories here for someone to put them in a book  :D

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Offline David VanDyke

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Re: Share your weird "I'm an author" stories and interactions
« Reply #36 on: June 09, 2018, 03:44:33 PM »
We need more.

Here's one, the same as Stephen King has told, but it happened to me.

At the end of one of my talks on self-publishing, guy comes up to me and says "I have this great idea but I don't want anyone to steal it. But I can tell it to you and you can help me write it and we can split the money."

Me: "I have 400 idea in my notes, and no time to write them all. Why don't you write it yourself?"

"It's too hard."

***

Another one, at one of my talks, labeled "for intermediate level self-publishers."

Nice older lady, sat there taking notes frantically. At the end of two hours raises her hand. "What's KDP?"







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Offline Athena Grayson

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Re: Share your weird or funny "I'm an author" stories and interactions
« Reply #37 on: June 09, 2018, 04:54:21 PM »
"What do you do?"

"I'm an author."

"Do I know you?"

"Well, we're talking now, you're on my front porch, I can drive to your house asleep. Your kid has crashed at my place once a week for a few years now and I'm pretty sure half my kid's clothes are in the laundry at your house so...probably in ways you'd rather not. But as far as books go, I write under a pen name."


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Online dgaughran

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Re: Share your weird "I'm an author" stories and interactions
« Reply #38 on: June 09, 2018, 05:10:07 PM »
Another one, at one of my talks, labeled "for intermediate level self-publishers."

Nice older lady, sat there taking notes frantically. At the end of two hours raises her hand. "What's KDP?"

I was at a self-publishing day in London and it started off with the basics but whipped through everything pretty fast getting into reader magnets and series marketing plans and some good stuff like that - it was a mixed crowd of newbies and experience trads all interested in self-pubbing.

Anyway, at the end of 6 hours of intense info, one guy puts his hand up for a question. "Is this all something your agent does for you?"
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Online Lynn Is A Pseudonym

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Re: Share your weird or funny "I'm an author" stories and interactions
« Reply #39 on: June 09, 2018, 06:17:31 PM »
Pretty sure I've told this here before, but my gynecologist was asking me questions and the topic of my writing came up. A few minutes later, I'm lying back on the table for my exam and he's asking me what I write, how self-publishing works, and how much money I make.

It was funny and weird at the same time. Don't think I'll ever forget that particular visit.

Offline joesmithx

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Re: Share your weird or funny "I'm an author" stories and interactions
« Reply #40 on: June 09, 2018, 06:23:40 PM »
Everyone, when they find out I'm a writer:

Them: "I have a great story that you should write!"
Me: "Let me guess. It's about you?"
Them: "Yes! It's so interesting and would make a great book!"

Uh huh.

Online Jan Hurst-Nicholson

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Re: Share your weird or funny "I'm an author" stories and interactions
« Reply #41 on: June 09, 2018, 11:50:53 PM »
"What do you do?"

"I'm an author."

"Do I know you?"



I had a variation on that one. "Should I know you?"

Fiction, family saga, humour, short stories, teen, children's
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Online Jan Hurst-Nicholson

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Re: Share your weird or funny "I'm an author" stories and interactions
« Reply #42 on: June 09, 2018, 11:53:58 PM »
Everyone, when they find out I'm a writer:

Them: "I have a great story that you should write!"
Me: "Let me guess. It's about you?"
Them: "Yes! It's so interesting and would make a great book!"

Uh huh.

I had a relative ask to be in my next book  ::). She'd never even read my books.

Fiction, family saga, humour, short stories, teen, children's
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Offline Ashly Kim

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Re: Share your weird "I'm an author" stories and interactions
« Reply #43 on: June 10, 2018, 06:01:26 AM »
I caught an Uber when I was in Kuala Lumpur and the driver asked what I did for a living. I told him I was a writer so he asked what I wrote because he wanted to read it. Since he was an older man, I told him he probably wouldn't be interested because I wrote romance. Turns out the guy is a huge romance fan! When we stopped at the lights, he took a selfie with me because he'd never met a writer before. Next set of lights, he made my find my books on the Amazon app on his phone and he bought a couple.

With the cheap price of Ubers in Malaysia, I came out ahead on that ride, and learned a valuable lesson about making assumptions about readers :)

I love this!
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Offline AliceS

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Re: Share your weird or funny "I'm an author" stories and interactions
« Reply #44 on: June 10, 2018, 08:03:33 AM »
This just happened recently to me. I was called for jury duty and dreading every minute of what looked like an ugly criminal trial. I was ultimately let go, whew.

From the jury box in front of the lawyers and prospective jurors, I was already sweating. I said I was a writer. The defense lawyer asked me what I wrote.

"Science fiction, fantasy and mystery."
"So no crime," he says.
"Well, there's always a murder in the mystery books," I say.
"But you haven't researched law enforcement in North Carolina," he says.
"No I have not." I wonder now if I should have told him that my cousin is a cop and answers my procedural questions.
He nods and makes some notes then looks up at me. "Published?"
I almost added the "self" to it, but that's just my own touch of Impostor Syndrome. But I said as firmly as I could. "Yes."


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Offline TromboneAl

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Re: Share your weird or funny "I'm an author" stories and interactions
« Reply #45 on: June 10, 2018, 08:14:32 AM »
This just happened recently to me. I was called for jury duty and dreading every minute of what looked like an ugly criminal trial. I was ultimately let go, whew.

From the jury box in front of the lawyers and prospective jurors, I was already sweating. I said I was a writer. The defense lawyer asked me what I wrote.

"Science fiction, fantasy and mystery."
"So no crime," he says.
"Well, there's always a murder in the mystery books," I say.
"But you haven't researched law enforcement in North Carolina," he says.
"No I have not." I wonder now if I should have told him that my cousin is a cop and answers my procedural questions.
He nods and makes some notes then looks up at me. "Published?"
I almost added the "self" to it, but that's just my own touch of Impostor Syndrome. But I said as firmly as I could. "Yes."

I've seriously considered writing a legal thriller just to get out of jury duty. I wonder if a short story would be enough.

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Online Jan Hurst-Nicholson

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Re: Share your weird or funny "I'm an author" stories and interactions
« Reply #46 on: June 10, 2018, 08:28:22 AM »
I've seriously considered writing a legal thriller just to get out of jury duty. I wonder if a short story would be enough.

I always imagine sitting in the witness box:

"You're a writer?"
"Yes."
"So, you make things up?"
"Well, er, yes."

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Offline Anarchist

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Re: Share your weird or funny "I'm an author" stories and interactions
« Reply #47 on: June 10, 2018, 09:26:02 AM »
I've seriously considered writing a legal thriller just to get out of jury duty. I wonder if a short story would be enough.

Try this: "I'm currently writing a guide to jury nullification."

"Opportunity is missed by most people because it is dressed in overalls and looks like work." - Thomas Edison

"Strategy without tactics is the slowest route to victory. Tactics without strategy is the noise before defeat." - Sun Tzu

Offline Michelle Files

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Re: Share your weird or funny "I'm an author" stories and interactions
« Reply #48 on: June 10, 2018, 09:49:18 AM »
I had a variation on that one. "Should I know you?"

Here's a good one:

Person: What do you do?
Me: I'm an author.
Person: I've never heard of you. (In a snarky voice.)
Me: I've never heard of you either.

Needless to say, she didn't like my response very much.   ;D

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Offline SevenDays

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Re: Share your weird or funny "I'm an author" stories and interactions
« Reply #49 on: June 10, 2018, 09:57:11 AM »
I always imagine sitting in the witness box:

"You're a writer?"
"Yes."
"So, you make things up?"
"Well, er, yes."

"And I'm wondering how I can use this in a novel right now!"

They'd LOVE that. :D

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