[Ilyria Moon]

O hai!

I'm still not happy with my product description, as I feel it doesn't put across the mood of the book. For example, while it does have a romantic thread running through it, other characters' journeys are quite important and it's not a straight romance. I had a great comment from a reader who GOT it; he said I was an 'ace at debunking the shallow' hehe. Swallow is satirical - 'Although satire is usually meant to be funny, its greater purpose is often constructive social criticism, using wit as a weapon.' I don't think my current blurb gets that across, or whether I even need to? I'm conscious of wanting it to be short enough to fit on the back of a 6"x9" paperback.

Also, I have two other characters who have prominent stories throughout the book - do they need mentioning? One is a fashion model who falls from grace and escapes justice, the other is a concert violinist with a barrel of secrets that come spilling out, linking her to my female protagonist.

Yes, I am rambling now.

Blurb:

The rules are simple in the entertainment industry: Play the game, get burned!

Luna Halliwell is on a path of self-destruction, until she meets infamous rock star Wolf Taylor in rehab, and falls hopelessly in love. Talented and hedonistic, Wolf’s at the clinic for one reason - to garner publicity for his new album – and he doesn’t see why he shouldn’t have a little fun while he’s taking one for the band. Love doesn’t figure in his long-term plans, so the last thing he banks on is developing feelings for her, too.

After a whirlwind romance, Luna discovers being half of a hot celebrity couple isn’t all it’s cracked up to be, and when a New York artist gives her the romantic attention she craves, she is faced with the ultimate decision. Stand by the man of a million girls' dreams or take a second shot at love?

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All advice greatly appreciated x

 

[TWGallier]

I thought it was okay, but it does read like a romance.  I don't get a satire vibe from the blurb.

 

[craigr1971]

I agree, the blurb sounds good. I do think it's 'talented but hedonistic' - but that's a small point. I still have trouble with blurbs, I think most authors do. We resist distilling down 75,000 words into 100. But it is simple. Say what the book is. Write the words you would say to your mother when she asks what it's about. We make this a harder process than it needs to be.

 

[Ilyria Moon]

LOL you're right; when I tell people what my book is about, it always sounds much more captivating than my blurb makes it out to be. I wouldn't be drawn to this book by the blurb, but even though I've read it countless times, while writing and editing, I love reading it and it still makes me laugh. I need to pay attention to what I actually say to friends about it and jot some notes down. It's girls' night in tonight, so I'll get to work. THe blurb has caused me angst all along hehe. The blurb for my second book just came to me and captures the mood of the novel, but this one doesn't, imo.

I thought it was okay, but it does read like a romance. I don't get a satire vibe from the blurb.

Thanks, TW

I know, me neither. I don't want to alienate the romance readers, because they will enjoy the book, but I want to entice the satire/humour crowd, too. Maybe if I introduce the other two characters into the blurb, it may become apparent. I'm going to go away and work on it.

 

[39179]

How about adding a simple tagline at the end of the blurb (which I think reads just fine, btw) that includes the word "satirical" or "humorous"? Just a quick, fun summary line that allows you to get that information across.

P.S: I think "Taking one for the band" is very funny.

 

[Ilyria Moon]

How about adding a simple tagline at the end of the blurb (which I think reads just fine, btw) that includes the word "satirical" or "humorous"? Just a quick, fun summary line that allows you to get that information across.

P.S: I think "Taking one for the band" is very funny.

Thanks, Andrew Yes, I definitely need to add something about the black humour. Do I need to introduce the other characters, or maybe mention something about encountering a motley crue along - oops, I mean crew hehe - the way? I guess I'm so attached to the characters I want them all to have prominence, but maybe it isn't necessary.

 

[39179]

You're very welcome, Ilyria. I think the possible danger of adding more characters into the blurb is that it could get confusing and overcrowded. So I would definitely go the motley cr(u)ew direction, something that suggests a lot of other offbeat characters (industry freaks?) in the story.

Keep in mind a blurb, as well as serving as a summary of the book, is primarily a hook. A hook to get someone to read a sample to see if it's their cuppa. So it's best when it's kept reasonably short and snappy (there's a lot of short attention spans by browsing, impulse buyers out there) that intrigues and arouses curiosity (or even prurience )

 

[Terrence OBrien]

"when I tell people what my book is about, it always sounds much more captivating than my blurb makes it out to be."

OK. Tell someone. Then just write down exactly what you said. Edit. Instant blurb.

 

[Ilyria Moon]

Thank you Yes, it needs to be snappy and simple, and I shall make sure I pay attention next time I'm talkin about it. 

 

[Ilyria Moon]

Okay, I'm still toiling away at this

This is what I have right now. I need to condense it, but I'm not having any luck! And it reads like a list of statements, imo. I don't know how to get my novel 'voice' into the blurb...

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Talented and hedonistic, British rock star Wolf Taylor is in rehab to garner publicity for the new album and he doesn’t see why he shouldn’t have a little fun while taking one for the band. Love doesn’t figure in his long-term plans, so the last thing he banks on is developing feelings for Luna Halliwell, a fellow patient.

Scandinavian model Lexie Hunter - a tabloid favourite for her bad behaviour as much as her fashion editorials - arrives in disgrace at the treatment centre. Thrilled to mentor her friend's new flame, she swiftly takes Luna under her wing and prepares her for life under scrutiny.

After leaving the clinic, Luna continues to strive for perfection, even if it means making herself sicker in the process. When the press drop a bombshell about Wolf's past, she realises being half of a hot celebrity couple isn’t all it’s cracked up to be, and finds herself torn between standing by the man of a million girls' dreams, or taking a second shot at love.
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Is it only romance if the two characters end up with each other? I'm still not sure what tags to use. I just have it under fiction at the moment.