[dalya]

Have any of you, besides George obviously, considered writing dross on purpose?

I mean page after page of the sexy man's sapphire eyes blazing like desert skies and making your inner goddess tremble with lust, giving you 9-paragraph orgasms that cause temporary blindness, etc.

Do you look at highlighted passages from some bestsellers and say, Dear me, but that's really stupid, so I'm going to write something stupid?

Then you create a dumb-sounding pen name and a cheesy cover, but d*mn it if the work doesn't turn out to just be okay and not horrendously terrible/stupid enough to be omg-it's-so-bad-it's-fan-fic-riffic-good popular, but still mildly amusing to a small subset of people, just like all your work?

Why do people enjoy descriptions that read like bad teen poetry? If I put in a bunch of descriptions of the male lead's irises and compare them to everything in that color range, will it get the books recommended more?

 

[vrabinec]

I mean page after page of the sexy man's sapphire eyes blazing like desert skies and making your inner goddess tremble with lust, giving you 9-paragraph orgasms that cause temporary blindness, etc.

I'd buy that.

p.s. Unfortunately, mine's probably dross unintentionally.

 

[ElHawk]

I've never considered it until now, Dalya.  You make it sound so appealing!

 

[41413]

I'm always in favor of nine paragraph orgasms that leave me blinded.

 

[Dawnchapel]

I know that in the audience for fantasy illustration, there's a significant number of people who are more interested in stuff they feel like they themselves might be able to draw if they were having a particularly good day, rather than the tightly-rendered, perfectly composed, high end concept art stuff.  I'm prepared to believe that the same is true of readers of slovenly prose: that they enjoy it more because they aren't challenged by it.

 

[JonDavis1]

Three things come to mind in reading this...

You're speaking about a culture that found "Are You Smarter Than a Fifth Grader?" to be one of the most incredible and intelligent shows in the country?

Oh and "Fifty Shades of..."something or other... I've heard something about it...

An FB meme of someone writing something incredibly deep and profound. And gets 4 likes
Another person writing, "I went shopping today!" And gets over a thousand likes....

Go for it. Dross is in

 

[Lyndawrites]

I'm always in favor of nine paragraph orgasms that leave me blinded.

^^^

This, Oh, yes, this.

 

[dalya]

Neil Gaiman says to "make good art," so I'd be violating the Good Art rule by writing in a style I don't find enjoyable to read.

And I have tried. And failed.

 

[Judi Coltman]

I'm always in favor of nine paragraph orgasms that leave me blinded.

I'll skip the 9 paragraphs - just get me the blinding orgasm.

 

[dalya]

I'm always in favor of nine paragraph orgasms that leave me blinded.

But you don't *get* them. You just read it while furrowing your brow and increasing your face wrinkles, because you didn't remember picking up a book about non-humans from the Planet SmashWord or whatever.

p.s. What was up with last night's American Horror Story? Lactation stuff plus necro-stuff? WTF? I felt like I was watching the new releases page of Smashwords come to life.

 

[41413]

p.s. What was up with last night's American Horror Story? Lactation stuff plus necro-stuff? WTF? I felt like I was watching the new releases page of Smashwords come to life.

Wow. Obviously I need to catch up on that.

You okay? You've lost your metrics.

 

[A.A]

Do I ever consider writing "page after page of the sexy man's sapphire eyes blazing like desert skies and making your inner goddess tremble with lust, giving you 9-paragraph orgasms that cause temporary blindness, etc."?

Yes.
But then my boyfriend tells me I'll hate myself in the morning.

 

[dalya]

Wow. Obviously I need to catch up on that.

You okay? You've lost your metrics.

I love American Horror Story because it's so freaking smart, well-written, surprising, and bloody entertaining. (WHICH IS, COINCIDENTALLY, THE EXACT OPPOSITE OF *MANY* POPULAR THINGS-present company KB authors excluded from this sweeping generalization.) I don't like the horror genre at all, and the imagery in my head wouldn't let me sleep last night, but gosh. And the production values! All the camera angles and interesting shots, ON TOP of a compelling storyline? So good. So much better than the sexposition scenes of GoT and the endless vampire board room meetings of True Blood. Yes, I could do with a bit less necro-stuff, but I'm an AHS fan.

Yes, I have lost my metrics. The code's in a notepad and I'll put it back when it is taunting me less. I don't like you guys knowing when I write 218 words in a day's work, so I may only update it once a month. I also don't like you seeing that I have sales, yet I keep bellyaching about how miserable I am about publishing some days.

Yes.
But then my boyfriend tells me I'll hate myself in the morning.

I don't know. Would you? Would you, really?

 

[vrabinec]

Yes, I have lost my metrics.

No, I still see them there. Have either or both of you recently had a nine page big O? Might be blindness setting in.

 

[MegSilver]

I don't consider it. It happens naturally.

 

[merryxmas]

If only I can be o.k. with writing the seven hundredth incarnation of sad-in-the-pants teenage girl who lusts after sparkly superbutts.  One day, one day...

 

[Hugh Howey]

I've made a decent wage doing just what you're describing.

 

[Cameron McKeth]

I'm always in favor of nine paragraph orgasms that leave me blinded.

Have I got a story for you! *Eyebrow waggle*

 

[A.A]

I don't know. Would you? Would you, really?

Hmmm maybe if I were on a beach in Bora Bora sipping tequila and the money was falling off the trees like over-ripe coconuts....
Sorry... what were you saying

 

[Guest]

Everything I write is bad by certain (realism based) standards. I love it though so that's what I write...