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Help me out with some ideas?

1221 Views 20 Replies 11 Participants Last post by  JRTomlin, 
J
I hate writing about children.

Ok, there are two (noble) boys about 5 or 6 in a medieval palace. It's winter and snowy. They're bored and get into mischief. Suggestions for mischief?

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S
They could steal the key to their raunchy older sister's chastity belt?
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J
Sam Kates said:
They could steal the key to their raunchy older sister's chastity belt?
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It's not that kind of novel. ;)
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Quiss
Slide down the hill with someone's super-expensive piece of armor/shield etc
Lob snowballs into the dungeon windows
Go out on a pond and the ice starts to crack

By mischief do you mean they get themselves into trouble or they do something they shouldn't do others or their property
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S
JRTomlin said:
It's not that kind of novel. ;)
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No... because they've stolen the key. :)
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John Daulton
Sledding on someone's shield... an heirloom or something could be bad!
Putting rocks in the middle of their snowballs.
Throwing giant snowballs (or balls of ice) with the castle trebuchet or other siege weapon (OMG how fun would that be?)
Making snowmen and women (with boobs no less!), and dressing them up like nobility, maybe they get caught doing naughty dialogue for them or some such.
Peeing off the parapets to see if it freezes before it hits the ground ... woot, yellow ice ropes! (also dangerous if its slippery up there, etc.)
... that's all I got for now.
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C
If they go outside, there's all sorts of snow and ice related mischief to get into like throwing snowballs (could serious hurt, if too hard or icy or contain pebbles), digging in the snow (dangerous, if snow collapses on top of boys), shaking snow from branches and trees, venturing onto a frozen river or lake (dangerous if the ice breaks).

Inside the castle they could venture into rooms, towers, balconies, etc... where they are not supposed to be (where they could overlook/hear something they shouldn't have seen/heard), climb onto furniture and hurt themselves, rummage through chests, cabinets and the like, hide behind draperies, get too close to a hearth fire and accidentally set something on fire, sneak into the stables and annoy the horses, throw things from the ramparts or pee from the ramparts, etc...
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G
Well, they could be tossing expensive clothing into the fire to watch it burn.

They could go into the kitchen and perhaps steal food.

How about the classic of hopping on the banister and sliding down the staircase.

Jumping on furniture. Or configuring it so they can enact a battle.

Writing in charcoal on the wall.

Going to an upstairs bedroom window, and dropping water on the servants when they go outside to do chores like walking the horses.

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Joe_Nobody
All boys experience a phase of pyromania. I would suggest candles/torches as a ready source of trouble.
All boys experience a phase of playing with toy weapons and most would love to get their hands on a real one. An errant arrow perhaps?
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J
I kind of like the peeing off the parapet walk. That's pretty funny. Getting themselves buried is good too. In Fife the snow might get that deep.

I don't think that a 5 year old would be interested in naughty dialogue and they know horses from early on too well to fool with them.

Maybe getting themselves buried after peeing off the parapet. They are cousins and about to be taken in hand as pages. Not to mention William is blamed for leading his royal cousin into mischief. By the way--just a fyi siege equipment such as trebuchets weren't kept set up in a palace or even a castle normally. They were very valuable pieces of equipment that were quite difficult to operate.

Shields were working equipment, but taking one could get them in trouble. Maybe they get buried in the snow after they sled on the shield. :D
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Jena H
Make snowballs around the crown jewels (or some other valuable object) and then throw it at someone (it would hurt it's victim, and/or the jewels could be lost in the snow).  Or they could reach out one of those narrow arrow-slit windows and grab some icicles and then use them like swords or lances (the icicles would be about three or four feet long, depending on the height of the castle.  They could board up (or somehow cover) the windows in one particular room and then sabotage the hearth so that the room fills with smoke.
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J
Thanks. Sir James Douglas has arrived at Dunfermline Palace after a long and exhausting raid into England. William is his 5 year old son and Robert is the king's grandson and the son of James's cousin:

Two figures wrapped in thick cloaks darted along the snow-coated parapet walk, one limping behind the other. The first stopped and pressed his hand to his mouth. James shook his head. What mischief were the lads up to? There was a command shouted from below. The two paused to watch squires drilling. In boiled leather and mail, they were puffing and whacking at each other under the severe gaze of Sir John Thompson.

William shrugged and crouch ran to the wall of the next tower. He threw himself flat and motioned his cousin down. Young Robert dropped flat on his stomach and James heard a giggle before William shushed him.

Mischief. No doubt about it. James softly clicked his tongue behind his teeth. He'd told William to take care of Robert, not teach him how to find trouble. He should put a stop to whatever to do they were about, but instead he crossed his arms and leaned against the icy stone of the tower doorway. A smile twitched his lips. God knew he'd done worse poaching the French king's forest than they possibly could.

William waited until the guard on the next parapet marched in the opposite direction. He jumped to his feet and fumbled at his lacings as his cousin was still pushing himself erect. His cock was no sooner out than James was striding toward the two.

William stared down at the yellow stream as he p*ssed and yelped in surprise when his father grabbed his arm. John Thompson was shouting below, "You imps from Hell!"

James gave both boys a shake. "Lace yourselves," he ordered as he desperately swallowed a grin.

"I thought it would freeze. I wanted a yellow icicle," William said, blinking up with a look of practiced innocence.

"Lace yourselves I said." James gave them both another shake although it wasn't a hard one, if he were to speak the truth. They were both lacing as fast as they could. "I arrive and seek my son to find him acting a villein. You'll both make your apologies to Sir John for pissing nearly in his face." He gave them a push on the napes of their necks. Holy Mary, he dare not laugh. A yellow icicle.

(And then they get into more trouble later and get taken in hand) Thanks for the suggestions!
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S
I know this is a first rough draft, but there are too many opportunities for smutty innuendos (or maybe I've watched too many Carry On films)...

JRTomlin said:
...erect. His cock...
James gave both boys a shake.
James gave them both another shake although it wasn't a hard one...
(And then they get into more trouble later and get taken in hand)
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Patty Jansen
I would think they play pranks on the staff.
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J
Sam Kates said:
I know this is a first rough draft, but there are too many opportunities for smutty innuendos (or maybe I've watched too many Carry On films)...
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Boys have cocks. I don't think that is smut. It's a biological fact, and how is a father shaking his son smut? There you got me.

ETA: Yeah, it's rough but I thought I'd share it because I got kind of a kick out of the yellow icicle. :D
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4
The first thing that sprung to mind for me is that I can't see any little boys staying away from the stables & horses, the guards or their dogs, or fire.  Lots of opportunity for mayhem :)
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Cherise
JRTomlin said:
I hate writing about children.

Ok, there are two (noble) boys about 5 or 6 in a medieval palace. It's winter and snowy. They're bored and get into mischief. Suggestions for mischief?
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They dump all the flour out on the floor and play in it like a sandbox!
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S
JRTomlin said:
Boys have cocks. I don't think that is smut. It's a biological fact, and how is a father shaking his son smut? There you got me.
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Ignore me - I was being infantile
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Caddy
He jumped to his feet and fumbled at his lacings as his cousin was still pushing himself erect.
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I would not use erect, since the subject has to do with their cocks. I understand they are five. I get that, but it reads in a way that takes me out of the actual prank and makes me instead laugh at the innuendo, while hoping you as an author are not trying to be juvenile. I know you, so I know you aren't. A stragner might think you were trying for innuendo. I also saw the one about "the hard one". I don't consider myself juvenile, but certain words do make people think along a different way than one might intend. The cocks aren't the issue, the unintended innuendos are.

Other than that, I love it!
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John Daulton
That scene seems entirely believable to me. But I agree the "erect" thing popped out as conspicuous to me as well. :p
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