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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Publishing a book independently or traditionally is a challenge. I’d love to hear about a time when you faced a crossroads as a writer, and how you came back from it. It’s a personal question, so I appreciate anyone willing to answer in this public forum.
 

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Discussion Starter · #7 ·
Mathew Reuther said:
Death. Despair. Ridicule.
Details? Stories of triumph inspire me, which is why I started this discussion. It's great to be able to communicate with other writers. However, if anyone doesn't want to get into too many details I understand. As I said this is a very personal question.
 

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Discussion Starter · #8 ·
NicWilson said:
Being a writer has been a part of my identity since before I had an identity. I've never had any sudden adversities, because I spent so much time researching, coming to conclusions, acting on them, that it all felt very fluid. Probably the toughest thing has been finding balancing it with my romantic life.

My fiance refused to read my writing for years, because she wanted me to have a safe place to work things through, even about her. Once she started reading, we realized that she was just as capable as every professional editor I've worked with, and far more capable than most of them. I've shamelessly used her talents since then. While I was writing my fits published novel, Whores, she acted as my research assistant, and due to the upsetting subject matter, we spent several months distant from each other. The world we saw shaping, the world she saw me shaping in the WIP, it caused us to view each other as potential threats. Especially her, since the things we were researching were things that made her feel particularly victimized.

We've been together for years, and there was no rational reason for why she'd stiffen when I stepped into the room, or any of the little hostile things that happened between the unusually forceful political debates. She's been with me through death in the family, unemployment, sickness, and nothing has stressed or separated us the way that that novel did. She'd read five other finished drafts of novels, without anything remotely resembling that vulnerability. Finishing that first draft was a huge relief... It pulled this giant weight off my shoulders, and I realized that we'd created those tensions by steeping ourselves in the worst of the world, I didn't want that distance between us again. I sent it to her to edit with my marriage proposal in the dedication.
Wow, thanks for sharing. That's a pretty deep story, and an awesome ending with the marriage proposal.
 

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Discussion Starter · #16 ·
Mathew Reuther said:
I have two children with my third wife, and her endless support and enthusiasm for my writing. I write for them. I write for my departed son. And I write to give a hearty fzck you to everyone who doubted me, and told me I couldn't do it.

Because I can. I am. I will.
That's motivation, and thank you for sharing. I can not imagine what that experience felt like. But it reminds me that we all have struggles, and that the will to keep at it is what matters most.
 

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Discussion Starter · #21 ·
Victoria J said:
Years of rejections took its toll on me emotionally and I became deeply depressed and stopped writing for a few years. I finally pulled out of that and started writing again, mostly for myself. And then a few years later the industry changed and now I see a possibility of making a living at this once again. Don't get many sales but I'm still hopeful and at least I'm published and proud of what I've done so far, if nothing else.
It's a great accomplishment to publish a novel. And like you said, the industry has changed. Self-publishing has evolved so much over the last 5 years. Who knows where it will be in another 5 years.
 

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Discussion Starter · #24 ·
DDark said:
Years ago, I stopped writing. Then I had a health scared that landed me in the ER, and the first thing I thought was how I'd wasted that time not doing what I loved. So I started writing again.

And writing.

Sixteen novels later, I had another health scare. And I thought, "Why am I not published?" So I decided to self-publish and give up that dream of getting picked up by a publisher.

Then I had yet another health scare last year, and as I went to the ER, I thought to myself, "But I haven't published all my books. I"m not done yet." Had a three month downward spiral with my health and bounced back. I thought about why those thoughts flitted through my head, of all things. It's because writing is a legacy; it's the way we are remembered. Long after we're gone, someone will tuck themselves under a blanket, turn on their reading lamp, and bury themselves in our stories that still live.

Sometimes life slaps you in the face to remind you of what's important. Your biggest adversity isn't a rejection letter, or not achieving the bestseller list, or even being accepted by family or peers for what you do.

Your biggest challenge is time.
Very well said, powerful stuff. The line that struck me was: being accepted by family or peers for what you do.

I think someone else mentioned this. Why do you think that is? I certainly have had co-workers, family members and others scoff at what I do.
 

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Discussion Starter · #34 ·
D.L. Shutter said:
Edward

Marry or get into a serious relationship wih someone who undestands and truly respects your love and aspriations for writing. I've observed one constant among all the sucessful indies and that's a LOT of time and effort put into the practice, all on top of lifes other demands.

And get two laptops.

Having to fight for every minute where you can write because you're just "wasting time" on your "stupid fantasy" is a less than ideal situation.

It's an adversity I'd recommend avoiding if possible.
Thanks for the advice. ;D And I agree with the last statement, %100. A committed relationship is not worth it if it disrupts your commitment to writing. Being an author is all I've ever wanted, everything else is secondary.
 
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