[pawlaw aka MXCIX]

o.k. we were talking in another thread about killing insects and it reminded me of a story...a really gross one.  I thought maybe others had gross stories, too, but I was thinking that this could be a topic that could go into the gutter fast, so I was hoping we could keep the stories somewhat above board by using "nice terms" to imply the not so nice parts of the story, if that makes any sense...I'll start...

We have a goldendoodle named Lucy who is now 2.  This story happened not long after we got her when she was about 6 months old.  She was still struggling a little with house training issues and had been sick a little.  She had gotten a hold of a toy that was made of long strings and had apparently eaten part of it.  My husband was away on a trip and my kids were at school.  On a side note, my husband and I had an implied deal in our marriage that, should anything of this nature ever come up, it would be his to deal with.  Alas, he was GONE!  She had to be inside and I didn't want her to come in having the obvious problem that she had.  I called the vet and she said that I would have to "help her" by removing the strings.  AAAAACK!!!!!  Never had done anything even remotely like that before.  I did so using a LOT of papertowels and had to walk to the garbage with it....needless to say, I almost threw up on the way...really gross!

 

[luvmy4brats]

Does having a baby in the front seat of your car count? Looked like someone butchered something by the time we were done. The paramedics got there after the fact with just enough time to deliver the placenta (into my favorite popcorn bowl no less)

The other one that comes to mind is the night my 2 year old daughter decided to paint herself, her wall, her bed, and all the bedding and clothing as needed..with the contents of her diaper...apparently it was fully loaded. Luckily I was at work and missed this joyous occasion, but Dad was home to handle the containment and decomaniate the scene.

 

[pawlaw aka MXCIX]

Wow!!!  Yes, that officially counts...baby in front seat of car definitely counts (and, I believe, trumps my story on many levels  )

OHHHHH, baby diaper contents...brings back memoires...I have three little ones....there is NOTHING like that smell except, perhaps, a distant second, would be the smell of my papertowel contents on the way to the garbage.

This is going to be a difficult thread to follow, I think, for the faint at heart...

 

[luvmy4brats]

Oh Puppy poo clean up (or out) is pretty high on the list.

 

[pawlaw aka MXCIX]

Just have to ask, did you keep the car?

 

[luvmy4brats]

Just have to ask, did you keep the car?

But of course. It cleaned up quite nice. We sold it about 2 years ago. Ran the poor thing into the ground. I didn't want to sell it when we did, but it was going to cost too much to fix. We did tell the guy who bought it what happened.

 

[pawlaw aka MXCIX]

I was wondering...my husband almost freaked out when my water broke in his car...I can't imagine the other...

 

[honyock]

Getting ready to go play tennis many years ago, I pulled out a water container with a pump top - depress the pump and water would come out a spigot, into a cup or your mouth. I filled it, then decided to test it to make sure it was in good working order.

So, I put my mouth under the spigot, and pumped. Nothing. It seemed to be jammed. So I pumped, this time a little harder. Still nothing, still seemed to be something in the way. So, stupidly, I pumped one more time, even harder. And out of the spigot and into my mouth dropped (or was projected at a very high speed), a live roach. A live, very big roach.

Once the roach ended up confused and in the sink, I went through almost a full bottle of Scope (and about two years of psychotherapy). I think I'm okay now.

Sam

 

[Kathy]

Roach in mouth, just kill me if that ever happens to me.

When my son was 16 he wanted to get a job, so we let him work part time at a pizza parlor. He reached up to get the pizza cutter and it fell down on his had slicing the pad of his thumb off. They called an ambulance and then me. I had to go get the piece of the thumb which they had put in a paper cup with ice. They were able to reattach it and he doesn't have a scar.

He also had his hand slammed in a car door which nearly severed two from the first knuckle up. My youngest stepdaughter was having a wedding reception and he shows up with his hand banaged with 2 pins sticking out of the top of the 2 fingers. Really yuk.

 

[Neversleepsawink;)]

When I was younger (17 I think) my dad brought home pizza.  He made sure to bring red pepper flakes too, that had been packed in small clear containers.  I went to pour the pepper on my pizza when I heard "Snap, crackle, and pop", and no I wasn't eating Rice Krispies.  I looked down to see maggots sizzling on the pizza.  Apparently they were in the red pepper flakes, the other little containers were full of them.  I don't have a fear of any insect or crawling creature, except for maggots!  SO GROSS!!!  Hot pepporoni maggot pizza, thank goodness I heard them sizzling or I might have bit into it.   

 

[luvmy4brats]

Ok, that last post lost me at that M word. I honestly have an extreme phobia of them. Won't even eat white rice. I'd rather see a cockroach. <shudder>

 

[Neversleepsawink;)]

Ok, that last post lost me at that M word. I honestly have an extreme phobia of them. Won't even eat white rice. I'd rather see a cockroach. <shudder>

Me too!

 

[kguthrie]

I was working as a camp counselor when I woke up to the sound of one of my campers puking all over himself. Shortly after I got him and his bunk cleaned up he managed to repeat the whole process. It was a night I will never forget.

 

[pawlaw aka MXCIX]

And out of the spigot and into my mouth dropped (or was projected at a very high speed), a live roach. A live, very big roach.

Once the roach ended up confused and in the sink, I went through almost a full bottle of Scope (and about two years of psychotherapy). I think I'm okay now.

Sam

Oh NOOOOOOO! I don't know what I would have done...actually, heart attack comes to mind. I don't know if I want to even think about the feeling of that thing crawling inside my mouth...

 

[pawlaw aka MXCIX]

slicing the pad of his thumb off. They called an ambulance and then me. I had to go get the piece of the thumb which they had put in a paper cup with ice. They were able to reattach it and he doesn't have a scar.

He also had his hand slammed in a car door which nearly severed two from the first knuckle up. My youngest stepdaughter was having a wedding reception and he shows up with his hand banaged with 2 pins sticking out of the top of the 2 fingers. Really yuk.

Oh wow...pins in the end of fingers...cutting parts off and then reattaching them...He sounds a little accident prone I have one like that...I have to watch that he doesn't unintentially hurt himself or his siblings...bull in a china closet...

 

[pawlaw aka MXCIX]

When I was younger (17 I think) my dad brought home pizza. He made sure to bring red pepper flakes too, that had been packed in small clear containers. I went to pour the pepper on my pizza when I heard "Snap, crackle, and pop", and no I wasn't eating Rice Krispies. I looked down to see maggots sizzling on the pizza. Apparently they were in the red pepper flakes, the other little containers were full of them. I don't have a fear of any insect or crawling creature, except for maggots! SO GROSS!!! Hot pepporoni maggot pizza, thank goodness I heard them sizzling or I might have bit into it.

O.k. M....m....mmmmm......I can't even type it. That story has taken the prize for me so far just because of the mmmm...mmmm...oh, I give up

 

[Neversleepsawink;)]

O.k. M....m....mmmmm......I can't even type it. That story has taken the prize for me so far just because of the mmmm...mmmm...oh, I give up

Yes it was really gross, I'm afraid to look in any containers now.

 

[Neversleepsawink;)]

Ok, here is another gross story.  It doesn't beat my maggot popping pizza...however it is pretty gross.  When I was 12 my sister (9 years old) and I had the flu.  We thought we were over the flu when we indulged in a new thing called Hot Flaming Cheetos with bean burritos for lunch.  My mom wanted to go buy dinner stuff so we went with her to Ralphs (grocery store).  My mom started to load the stuff on the convayer belt when my sister said "I don't feel so good.  Blah Split Splat!"  Yes, she threw up a never ending river of bean burrito with flaming cheetos all over the coveyer belt.  The cashier had it running so it was caught under the belt.  It was all over the food and belt, cleaning it up was sick.  I still never eat Hot Cheetos! 

 

[Ann in Arlington]

I want to know where you were shopping. . . .I will never shop there. 

Ann

 

[Michael R. Hicks]

Oh, dear. I saw this thread and figured, "Hey, this has my name written all over it from when I was a kid..." I'll only relate one incident here, although I have a lot of others (unfortunately!)...

Just for a bit of background, I think my parents were trying out for the Noah's Ark competition: they raised Weimaraner dogs, Arabian horses, plus we had chickens, ducks, salamanders, gerbils, and a goat (hey, don't ask me: I just lived there!).

Onward: One of the foals had an intestinal hernia that hung down a bit from her navel. It wasn't an imminent problem, but was something that needed to be treated so she wouldn't run the risk as an adult of having an intestinal rupture (and yes, you can imagine part of what's coming). The vet we had at the time was fine at treating the run-of-the-mill ailments, but he - unbeknownst to us - was totally out of his league with this. He attached a clamp to the hernia, and over the next couple of weeks tightened it down to pinch off the hernia.

Unfortunately, the idiot caught a piece of the filly's intestine in the clamp. One fine evening my mom can pounding in from the corral shouting at dad that the clamp had come off, and half of the horse's gut had followed suit. Dad charged out and I followed him (I wasn't old enough to help in this situation, but you can't exactly sit around watching Lost in Space while something like this is going on).

So for the next half hour until the first of what turned out to be every horse vet from fifty miles around arrived, my dad stood out in the corral holding this poor filly (I can't remember how old she was, but she probably weighed a good three hundred pounds) up out of the dirt while trying to keep the rest of her innards where they were supposed to be. Bare-handed. After nine hours of operating, the veterinary team was just stitching her closed when she stopped breathing, and that was that.

For me, the most poignant part of this memory wasn't the gross part that happened to the horse (which was terribly sad), but the courage and physical strength that my dad had to do what he did, keeping that horse on her feet as she bucked and kicked, literally holding her together all that time. In the eyes of a kid who was maybe ten or twelve, he seemed like Superman...